- I miss my friends; I haven't any here
- I miss my parish; I haven't one here
- I miss my dog; she's here, but elsewhere on the island due to no pets at our temp. condo
- I am bored shitless; there's plenty to do on O'ahu, but little money to do it with (see bullet above - ah, yeah, the condo)
- I love my kids, but they are driving me crazy (they think they're bored, well, it is just about all I can do not to scream at them and lose my mind all over the place because I feel the very same . . . but I cannot weaken to that extent - we're in this condo at least until mid-Aug.
- I'm six hours behind my friends now . . . I'm barely out of bed when they have finished with lunch . . . when I'm finishing lunch, and thinking about ringing them up, they are at dinner or . . .
Then, I start to think about all the people that never had any of these things. They solely exist on God and other's mercy. They are happier than me, I think, most of the time. I wonder what the heck my problem is when I have all this stuff (though it isn't with me as of yet, I expect I'll have it all soon enough). I think about those who have had about what I have or more and lost it in a storm, house fire, or divorce . . . whatever disaster you can think of . . . and I have more things than them at this moment.
I balance out and put on a bit of gratefulness. And, I pray for those who have everything and yet nothing; nothing and yet everything.
Change my heart, O Lord. Create in me a patient heart, a thankful heart, a wondrous heart.
So, to keep my hands busy . . . I have finally begun to finish the cross stitch I started to make Crickles before he was born eleven years ago. Here's a picture of my progress. It's silly how long it has taken me to get back to it . . . but ALL THOSE BOOKS . . . ahem.
If you want to see some reasons why this condo isn't so bad (the view), I'll be posting pics there today. Just follow this link: Aloha Spirit.
19 comments:
Oh, prayers coming your way, no matter what the time is there!!
Thank you, Jamie. I am so silly to allow myself to go down into the dumps over silly stuff . . . its my human weakness I suppose. Nothing God can't allow me to get through, yeah? Hugs!!!
Not silly stuff...this is a HUGE adjustment. You are doing great, and we are continuing to pray!
My prayers to you. I can't imagine what you are experiencing as I've been in the same old house for 16 years, but it sounds like you have a very good prayerful attitude, and that goes a long way towards making things feel better. Just knowing that God is close to you in your struggles is a big help, isn't it?
My prayers are with you too. You can always read CMR if you get bored. We make fools of ourselves everyday.
God bless you and help you through this adjustment period. Don't lose your sense of humor.
matt
We ALL do that on occasion...give yourself a break! New place, crazy kids, no dog...put a countdown calendar on the fridge & cross days off, it will give you some perspective...this IS temperary! Oh, and take Matthew,s advice...CMR always cheers me up!
And remember, you can e-mail friends in the middle of the night and it's OK!
Pax Christi
I feel for ya Sarah! I can't imagine. This too shall pass though and one day you many *laugh* about it. Do they at least have some darn good coffee there to get you through?
In my prayers...
Thanks all of you! I read CMR regularly but not with coffee!! BTW, there is good Kona coffee here. I have some morning 10% blend, 'cos the 100% is a bit more money . . . and, like most places in the U.S. there's everything here pretty much. Just a stone's throw away (well, a few blocks, actually, but manageable) are two - TWO - Starbucks. In the mall behind us (big mall, no joke) there are several coffee hut things and probably two or three Starbucks "stalls").
I remember the friendless feeling when we moved...and it's hard to get over. Have you tried a google search "free things to do in Honolulu'? It isn't free, but you need to go to the Polynesian cultural center (mil disc!) and if you home school, you can call that a field trip. It's been a long time, but I recall going to many buddhist temples and other great things. Enjoy!
I so much recall being almost in the same boat here 6 years ago. We found our house on January 1st, but weren't able to move in until mid-March. We were put in a fancy schmancy condo for 30 days, courtesy of Rob's company - but after that, we were on our own. We hadn't sold our house in B.C. yet - so we were still paying a mortgage and could barely afford temporary housing... but I found a three bedroom, quasi furnished apartment for $1500/mo. Way more than we could afford, but it had a kitchen at least. We went to the Dollar Store and bought four plates, forks, spoons and knives and a pot or two then to Walmart to get sheets for the beds. It was the coldest Winter ever here too - and we were snowed in for weeks. The apartment was actually a house that was broken up into other apartments - ours was the main one, but there were two others - one in the basement and one made out of the garage. Two bachelors were smoking dope in the garage all the time and we could smell in coming up through the vents...
Rocky was barely 2 years old - he had his 2 yo birthday in that apartment, actually. It was a tough time - and I can't believe we made it through.
We ate out more than we could afford - I think we're STILL paying on the line of credit due, in part, by those few months in that apartment - -
I feel for ya, Sarah. But this too shall pass.
The crucible of life, eh?
Boredom? Well - looks like you have SOME solutions to that for a bit...books, needlework, blog. How about walking around and checking out the place more? Public transit?
Sponsor helping you any?
I remember us having a sponsor when we were stationed in Naples, Italy in 1971... they helped show us some things to do...
Is there a pool on base you can go to?
Aloha!
Melikalikimaki means Merry Christmas, right?
Does it help to know I wouldn't mind having a three year stint in Hawaii myself? LOL
God bless.
praying for you dearie. moving is hard enough. i can't imagine what you folks have been thru. and even though you don't have it "bad" like you say, for there are so many other less fortunates out there, sometimes it's hard to see it when you are in the thick of it. God knows your heart. patience is one heck of a virtue. but one thing is for certain- you do look so lovely sittin' there sewing away!
aloha.
:)
Erika - funny thing, but I did just that yesterday and jotted down a few things for us to do. I know Saturday we are going to the flea market at the stadium with our sponsor. :) I'm hoping to find some skirts/shirts really cheap! I have been told I would not be disappointed. We'll do the Poly center after we get into housing unless we get so pent up/bored here that it's a stress valve release to take the drive and cough up the dough . . . ITT office has pretty good prices. Some times being military does have its extra benefits.
Hopefullyguided - I think you had it worse . . . at least we can go outdoors! Well, the condo has a nice pool and hottub (I'll post pics tomorrow) and a tennis court, some walkabout thing along the tennis courts with some great grills and tables. There is a HUGE mall behind us and great public transit. Our sponsor has been more than a great help; best help in keeping our dog for us. Mele Kalikimaka is Merry Christmas in Hawaiian. I think you would like HI very much. I do like it, it's just a little rough right now, but I know it will get better. At least I'm not having stress headaches and my TMJ is giving me a few night's breaks.
Regan - you are too sweet! I love how fat me knee looks, but whatever. :)
{{{{Sarah}}}}....this too will pass. I'm saying this to me just as I am to you. But it's still hard, and it takes its toll on us and on the kids. Mine are miserable away from us and having their faith attacked every day (I had no idea that would happen), but I can't fix it or make it better. I just have to trust those Big Hands that carry us and try to be still and know that He is God. I'm holding your own world in prayer, sweetie, along with mine - us displaced mamas.
Good on you for finishing the cross-stitches!!!! Way to go!!
We spent about a month at the Hobron when we first got there. I know how you feel Sarah. Hang in there, it gets easier. It's that feeling of being in limbo that makes it hard. You just want to get settled.
Oh Man wish I could swim across the ocean and hang with ya! Having a beer over the blog world is not the same.
Sounds like there is a lot of energy the kids need some release!
Try a work out tape together. Try puzzles? How about painting or playdough! Whenever I get stir crazy I have to get silly with the kids.
Sorry about missing your pooch. I bet she misses you too!
(((hugs))) to you. Know there are many friends here who love ya!
I think all of us who have been uprooted and transported to some place else can empathize with you! Ron could at least go off to work. I used to call my mom in the middle of the day long distance when the rates were really expensive just to hear a voice that wasn't whining or crying! Praying for you!!! Cathy
You look lovely!
Are you on the same island as Esther?
Mimi - I believe so. O'ahu. Aloha! Mimi, I got some books: Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood, and, Hawaii by James A. Michener. Hope they'll be good!
Jenny, Christine, and Kalona and Cathy - thank you for your concerns and prayers for me/us. It's good to have friends like you all around. :)
I hope you get to meet. I love Michener's "Hawaii" I actually stopped reading "Divine Secrets..." which is pretty rare for me.
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