I sign on here and the first thing I'm lambasted with in Yahoo News: Brad Pitt's secret meeting with the President. Bah! Obama wouldn't be president if he wasn't a die-hard celebrity. We cannot run this country on the whims of celebrities. No, I did not entertain the article, because I can't abide the celebrity mentality in this country.
There were a few celebs I used to love knowing about (the dudes, mostly): in my youth it was Duran Duran and Depeche Mode (Nick was a cutie and I thought that Alan Wilder was beyond yummy-lish); then I watched a few teenage-angst films with Christian Slater in it and entertained my thoughts (too many if you ask me) with him for years . . . Then I met my husband and still thought about celebs. Unhealthy. Then, dammit, Lord of the Rings introduced this lovely specimen of man ever: Orlando Bloom. My thought life took off and my prayer life suffered . . . I was unhappy! I wanted the super duper good looking man and the life that went with it . . . Let's just say, obsession with anyone that isn't your spouse is robbing your marriage of the fullness it can be. There was no way my husband could please me when my brain had me living another life.
Why do I share this? I know I'm not alone. We all have varying degrees of liking whom we should only admire. There is nothing wrong or unhealthy about liking some one's acting talent and enjoying their films - and even admitting they are handsome or pretty. After that, though, you know, it is walking on shaky ground. Why? It isn't right to be so obsessed about an actor that you purchase every magazine with his face on it or in it. It isn't right to scour the inter net for websites . . . and stare at him for ages. It isn't right to think about him for hours on end or to use him in your "gotta get to sleep" strategies. Trust me, to varying degrees I did this - wasting my time, in small ways damaging my marriage (which is on solid, loving, good ground - but I was risking it by being unhappy, you see?), and really telling God I was an ingrate about all the blessings He's given me by wanting what I cannot ever have.
With all due respect, I laid all that to rest with the Confessional and a wonderful priest who has counseled me out of that ungrateful business. I haven't purchased the glossies in a long time and when I see Orlando's lovely face, I thank God that he has a good life (by all outward appearances), and I wish him well. That's it. That is within the proper boundaries of admiring a person. And, I don't surf the net or link to any pages on Orlando like I used to. I was following his tail for a couple of years. My friend, Dawn, knows my stupidity then, and really has been a great person in assisting me in seeing my folly.
I used to think it was funny to say, "My boyfriend, Orlando . . . ". Some of you may have done this and some may not have. Some may still do this. For many of the some who do, it has become habitual and really borders on infantile. I did this - I'm just dishing on myself, but I tell you what, there are many women my age (39) who fantasize this way, thinking it harmless and just for fun, but it's a dangerous business. And, I know it made me look like an ass.
It's an embarrassing confession here, but perhaps it will help some of you who are struggling with such silliness. But, think about your husband for a long second here: how do you think he feels knowing you think some other man is better looking or even could compare? It would hurt me to know if my husband found anyone else remotely attractive to the point he had to have magazines or Internet sites with her on it. How obnoxious! Yet, it would be okay for me to? Well, doesn't Jesus say if you think about doing it, you have? Lordy, have I had time in the confessional over it! If you keep justifying the sin, you look stupid. Period. Yes, God still loves you, but do you love you? Really? Then, stop looking outside the marriage.
In the past two years, I have been free of the obsessiveness. My soul is at peace. I have noticed some bloggers who have their wee fan behaviour and some that are trying to be funny, but then, go over the border on posting pics and comments about an actor or actors - it's just wrong. I want to gag, but I also feel so sorry for people who justify that infantile behaviour with the rather harmless sounding, "but I love my husband and he's "it" for me." Well, if your husband is "it" for you, drop the celebrity-itis.
This is so not where I was meaning to go today, but you know what, I sense that the Holy Spirit is wanting me to share this so it may help someone put it all into God's perspective.
And now for something completely different . . .
Adoration was wonderful last night. It was great to just be with God in a focused way. I sat to the left of the altar. After Adoration, I went to the right to chat a friend and the incense smelled better there. On the left I could only smell embers, on the right, the parfume. Anyway, that stuff is intoxicating! I love it. It was nice to put all my blogging buds intentions up there - it seems like it's a bigger, more serious request there than when I'm just warming up my sofa and praying here.
Later, I will post about friendships. I was reading St. Francis de Sales' Introduction to the Devout Life during some of the Adoration time and he had much to say about friendships. Also, there are some of you (probably many of you, like me) who suffer with what "to do" about such and such a friendship. Perhaps with this Saints help, I can write something effective and "food for thought" about friendships.
We over-slept the alarms this AM so I had to drive my son to school on fumes. Let's just say I do not like pumping petrol. A few years ago, I was pumping petrol using the automatic shut off. It didn't shut off . . . I had to throw away my jeans, socks and shoes when I got home. It scared me from the pump for years. This morning, I put the petrol in. Of course, I shouldn't be afraid that it would ever happen again - the pumps are all brand spankin' new! It still unnerves me a bit. After that, I dropped my son off at school and went to get my money from a daycare job.
Tonight is Soup and Stations. I love this. I'll be making macaroni and cheese soup (Pampered Chef recipe) to bring. It will not have the broccoli or ham in it. We know why no ham, but why not the veg? Well, it waters it down some and then kids will whine. Yes, they will. So, for soup and stations, I make it a bit more plain and everyone loves it.
A question . . .
Would any of my readers like me to participate in 7 Quick Takes, Simple Woman's Daybook, or Friday Fun Facts, or anything like that? I started to do some of these and sort of went 'ta ta' to them. But, I am willing to do something on a regular basis if there's enough suggestions. Friday Fun Facts could be where you all ask me something you want to know about me or whatever. I'd ask for Q's on Thursday and answer on Friday. Well? What say you?
Friday, March 6, 2009
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12 comments:
Wow, everyone has long posts today!! I'm never going to leave this computer!!
No unhealthy crushes on stars here....when I was younger, I liked Shawn Cassidy, actually I think I liked Parker Stevenson better (Hardy Boys)but that was like 4th grade.
I love the Devout Life book, it's one of my favorites!! Especially the Friendship chapter!!! It helped me at a time when I needed it!
Wow, that post had a lot to say! I've never been one to be attracted to the celebs - too many things they do aren't 'beautiful', shall we say. I always wondered what to do with the posters from Scholastic that had teen hunks on them - why would I put them on my wall?? They were tossed. I'll admit that Orlando Bloom was fun to watch as an elf, though. But I think I was trying to figure out why he glowed or had a light about him that the non-elves did not show.
I'm only 1 chapter into the Introduction to the Devout Life. So far, so good. I'd be interested in your perspectives on friendship, in light of his writing.
I really appreciate your post on the celebrity thing. I used to be that way as well (in my 20s), but I think that as I get older (39 this September), I just think what is the big deal about such and such a person? Most of them annoy me because of their liberal views anyway. My hubby is truly the only one on my radar!
Another book I think I need to look for! I swear I am never going to finish reading this way!!!
I agree about praying for my mlogging friends. I go to Adoration on Sunday nights, and I go through person by person (including you!). It is nice to have such a community, isn't it?
Gosh, my comment is a post in itself! LOL!
You are so right about the celebrity thing! I hate it and I hear we are even worse here in England than the US but I am not sure whether or not this is true.
Sarah! You have no idea how much I "loved" someone ...it was a musician and I won't even go into who because I'm older than most of you and you would not even know this guy, but I was young and had such a silly imagination, but then, much later, I still wondered how he was and did find out alot about him from the internet some years ago by a fan club leader he had. To this day, she and I have a very good friendship and so that is the good thing that came out of that! Ha! For me, the celeb thing means nothing anymore because as most of us have noted, they are so very full of themselves (almost all) and it only gets worse. In some ways, as adults, we are a bit responsible for filling up their heads and pocketbooks and then wondering why they think so flippin much of themselves! I saw that Pitt went to D.C. who cares? I sure don't.
We need to help them just get over themselves..back off movie spending, music purchasing.
Yes, I agree, we'd all be terribly hurt if our husbands let their minds wander about such things. There are and should be boundaries and we've all needed to learn them, well, at least most of us.
The older you get..the more foolish ya feel. My momma had a crush on some movie star..can't recall, but she'd just grin everytime she thought of him..oh, I recall..Ronald Coleman. ?? Anyway, I think I got the idea that it was a cute thing and no harm at the time, but it can be harmful. Good post!
Hey, yeah..your game sounds fun!
Thanks for prayers at Adoration.
We have our time tonight at 8-9, but I'll be at work a block away until 8:15. I'll keep you in prayer too, sweetie! :)
Great post, Sarah. The celeb crush problem can be particularly difficult for guys because we're so "looks" driven in the first place. For me, it was Farrah Fawcett during the "Charlie's Angels" days.
I don't have that sort of problem (thanks be to God, and I really meant that!), but I know that many guys do (and teenage boys, too!), and it's one way that Satan uses to lead 'em into pornography.
I have the "Devout Life" as well - still in the first chapter (I'm more of an ostrich than an eagle at times, but I'm working on it!)
I have noticed some bloggers who have their wee fan behaviour and some that are trying to be funny, but then, go over the border on posting pics and comments about an actor or actors... I haven't seen much of that, but I have seen a lot of pics of Nancy Pelosi on come blogs as of late - and let me tell you, she does not strum my banjo one bit!! LOL!
Keep up the great writing!
You are a wonderful example of a woman sharing from her heart no matter what. After catching up on your blogging Sarah, I admire how true you are to being real, remaining steadfast and sharing the sweet and the savory in a transparent way for others to chomp on. Silly crushes for me happened long, long ago in my tweens; David Cassidy was one in my day, ya know?
All kidding aside, truly my hubby remains my main man though and though i do not struggle with the same things as others, be sure there are struggles still happening. Keep being you. I look forward to every post. God Bless you!!!!! :-) grin...
BTW - Depeche Mode rocks! (at least they did for me until I reverted and decided a lot of their songs were quite, um, twisted)
LarryD - you always always make me laugh! Thank you. And, I agree about DM, their lyrics are a bit "out there" and such. There's a song I love of theirs, tho', called "Get the Balance Right". Just love that song.
I used to love Charlie's Angels - but my mum always chased us out of the room 'cos of their skimpy shorts! I would probably find it difficult to find anyone who NP did make strum a banjo. Ugh!
Everyone - thank you for your kind comments! I know it's a lot to chew and then the other post, too, but they were rumbling in my heart and ready to come out.
What a great post Sarah.
I am glad I left it unread and came back to it tonight.
About your question, I think that is a great idea. I would love to ask you questions and learn more about you.
Therese
Thinking out loud.
A simple take on this, when waters of discernment get muddy, is to look at it as script writing.
No one is here to live according to a script written and projected onto them by someone else. No one - no stranger, no intimate, no acquaintance, no attraction, no subordinate, no superior, no friend, not even spouse or child, no anyone, not those who serve us in the public either.
We tend to write scripts for our intimates through fear or desire or discontent - if it's not just plain thoughtlessness and carelessness, which is often the case with scripts we write for everyone else. In any event and for whatever reason, it's unfair to others by dismissing and devaluing who they are. But it reflects badly, not on the 'morons' around us but, on the script writer.
It just occured to me that we talk about being pro-life in the cumulatively big context of millions of babies being aborted. Well, while not a matter of death, script writing is a show of disrespect for...
...life, as you encounter it in daily life.
I prefer to stick to real people rther than the make believe we think celebs are like.
:-)
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